Attachment Styles and Relationships: How Couples Therapy Can Help You Sync Better

Attachment styles and relationships are interconnected aspects of human psychology that play a significant role in our interpersonal interactions. Attachment styles are defined by behavior exhibited when the relationship is threatened. For example, a secure attachment person may be able to share their feelings openly and honestly and seek support during relationship distress. A partner with insecure attachment may shut down or withdraw or the opposite becomes clingy and needy. Couples therapy can help partners improve their ability to sync better when their attachment styles become triggered during conflict. Couples therapy can help partners become securely attached and build an emotional connection that helps them feel safe and secure when conflict occurs. They will learn that no matter what they will get through the conflict together. 

A couple sit apart from each other on a bench visibly upset with each other representing a couple who could benefit from understanding their Attachment Style through Couples Therapy in Boca Raton, FL.

Understanding Your Attachment Style

The first way couples therapy can help couples sync better is by helping both partners understand what their attachment style is. These include styles such as anxious, avoidant, or secure. By understanding their style, they will comprehend their emotional reactions and behaviors in relationships. They will be able to tell their partner what they need during this time of distress. For example, if an avoidant person shuts down and withdraws during conflict, they can learn to let their partner know they need time to calm down and will return to them to talk things out when they are calm. 

Identify Patterns and Traumas From the Past

The second way couples therapy can help is by exploring a client’s past experience in childhood to identify patterns and traumas that may be influencing their present behavior. This can help clients develop empathy for themselves and their partners. Additionally, they know that their reactions come from their past with their parents who maybe didn’t meet their emotional needs. Or learning that they didn’t have a model of a healthy relationship so they are repeating what they saw their parents do. The insight can lead to healing and growth. 

A couple sits watching the sunset with their head leaning on each other representing a couple who has strengthened their bond in Couples Therapy in Boca Raton, FL.

Improving Communication

The third way couples therapy can help is by helping couples improve their communication. In couples therapy, clients learn their negative patterns of communication. In Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, couples learn that this negative pattern or dance developed over time and became worse, causing an emotional disconnection. The therapist will help them slow their communication down, help them see what they both do in this dance and how they feel when it happens, and then help them step out of it so they can talk in a better way together. 

Create a More Secure Attachment

Lastly, and most importantly, couples therapy can help clients develop more secure attachments by building trust, intimacy, and vulnerability in their relationships. Couples therapy helps partners become more accessible, engaged, and responsive with each other. This helps to create a secure bond that helps partners feel safe in the relationship. They learn to turn to each other in times of distress and give each other comfort, support, and love. 

A couple embraces as the sunsets behind them. Improve your relationship by learning about your attachment  style in Marriage Counseling in Boca Raton, FL.

Learn More About Attachment Styles in Couples Therapy in Boca Raton, FL Today.

As you can see, attachment styles are important in couples therapy. Couples therapy can help clients understand their own attachment styles, identify patterns and traumas that may be influencing their present emotional reactions, improve communication and develop secure attachment in the relationship. The most effective therapy for this is called Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy which has 25 years of research showing that EFT helps couples develop a secure bond and creates long-lasting changes in couples. I am a certified EFT therapist and have helped hundreds of couples create a secure and loving bond together. Don’t hesitate to call and make your appointment today.

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Other Mental Health Services Offered at Heart Connection Center in Boca Raton, FL.

In addition to Couples Therapy, Heart Connection Center offers a wide variety of mental health services to meet you wherever you are at in your life. These include Women’s Counseling, Men’s Counseling, Anxiety Treatment, Child and Teen Counseling, Depression Treatment, and Intensive Couples Counseling. We also offer our services in an online therapy format as well.